


that sinner

by thatapostateboy



Category: Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age II
Genre: But isn't relevant to the plot of the fic as such, F/M, Garrett is just there chilling in the background, Two Hawke AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-31
Updated: 2017-12-31
Packaged: 2019-02-24 08:47:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,532
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13210206
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thatapostateboy/pseuds/thatapostateboy
Summary: In the distance, the Chantry is burning, but all Marie Hawke can look at is Anders.Written for the prompt 'I'd die for you.'Listening suggestion: Devil's Backbone by The Civil Wars





	that sinner

Marie couldn’t take her eyes off the Chantry burning in the distance. The smoke and ash from the fires had filled the skies, blocking out the stars. Everything had finally come to a head, the Templars, the mages, the secrets that Anders had been keeping… It all made sense now.

She could hear the Knight Commander invoking the Right of Annulment; hear the cries of protests from the mages and the First Enchanter, their pleas of innocence.

It was Garrett’s hand on her shoulder that pulled her out of her trance. She whipped her head around and saw that everyone’s eyes were on her.

“I’m defending the mages, sister,” he told her, his voice low, watching her face carefully, “I am not going to stand by and let her slaughter my people.”

“Consider your choice carefully, Champion,” Meredith warned her, “You may not be a mage, but if you stand with them, you will share their fate.”

She looked between the mages and Templars. The mages were not her people, not like they were Garrett’s. He could lead them in a way she never could. She had no obligation to them. No magic ran through her veins. But it was as deep rooted in her life as the people she loved. Her father, her brother and sister, Merrill, Anders… _Those_ were her people. Her family. And she would protect them, no matter what, because that was her role. She had kept the innocents of Kirkwall safe for years, she had defended the mages at every turn. She was not going to abandon them now.

“I will not help you, Meredith,” Marie told the Knight Commander, then looked to Garrett, “I am with you, brother. Always.”

They moved to stand in front of the mages, beside the First Enchanter; the Champions of Kirkwall, side by side, never standing alone. She kept her eyes fixed on the Templars. If she looked around, she would see Anders, and she couldn’t face him, not now, not with Meredith here.

Meredith took her Templars and left to rouse the rest of the order whilst Orsino told his mages to get to the Gallows. He glanced once at Anders and told the Champions that he would leave him for them to deal with.

When they were alone with their friends, Marie finally let herself look around at him. He had sat himself on a crate so that no one could see his face, staring at the floor. She felt as though all the air had been knocked out of her when she realised that all of this, all of the destruction around them, had been caused by him. It may have been the spirit’s idea, but it would have been his hands that made the explosives that killed the people in the Chantry, those healer’s hands that she loved so much.

But this was what the conflict needed. It was never going to be resolved. It needed a catalyst. It would lead to many deaths, but it gave the mages a chance; something they didn’t have before. A chance for freedom.

“Go to him,” Garrett said quietly to her, “Whatever you decide, I will stand by it.”

She walked slowly, feeling the impact of every footfall on the ground as she approached Anders. She looked at the back of his head, thinking of every single part of him that she loved, his smile, his eyes, his laugh. She wanted nothing more than to reach out, hug him, touch his shoulder, anything, just to let him know that she was here.

But then she would remember the Chantry burning behind her and she would stay her hand.

“Whatever you’re going to say, don’t,” Anders said quietly when he felt her presence behind him, “There’s nothing you can say that I haven’t already said to myself. I took a spirit into my soul and changed myself forever to achieve this. This is the justice all mages have awaited.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” she asked, her voice dry, “I might have understood.” That was a lie. There was no ‘ _might’_ about it. She _would_ have understood. She always understood. She would have been there for him, helped him look for a better way, but she knew, deep down, that if it had come to it, if he had asked, she would have helped him.

“I wanted to tell you,” he admitted, “But what if you stopped me?... Or worse, what if you wanted to help? I couldn’t let you do that… Because I know you, Marie, I know that you would have wanted to. The less you knew, the safer you were,” his head raised a little, but he didn’t look around at her, “The world needs to see this. Then we can all stop pretending that the Circle is a solution… And if I pay for that with my life, then so be it.”

She let out a shaky breath. He couldn’t be suggesting that she should kill him. Was this what he wanted? He had done his work and now he would be made a martyr for it. Or would it be a punishment?

Garrett’s words echoed in her head.

_Whatever you decide…_

Garrett knew. He understood the end that Anders would expect, knew what he would sacrifice for the cause, what everyone had warned her about all these years. And yet here she was, hoping for the best as always.

“Whatever you do, please just do it,” he said quietly to her, “And just… Just know that I’m glad it’s you, not some Templar… It was nice to be happy, for a while. You know I never belonged anywhere, not in the Circle, not in the Wardens, but I finally had a chance to have a home, a family… And I owe that to you.”    

She stood completely still, hand poised over her dagger. She thought about it. She knew she could make it quick and painless for him, because even after everything he had done, she owed him that much. It would be kinder to kill him now; she didn’t know what life he could lead after today.

“Anders,” she whispered.

“Don’t,” he begged, “Please… Just do it.”

“Anders,” her voice hardened, “Look at me.”

Slowly, he turned his head and he looked at her. He watched her as she unsheathed her daggers, swallowing nervously at the sight of them. Her eyes met his and she threw the blades aside, sending them clattering across the street.

“No.”

He got to his feet, looking around for her daggers, “Marie… What are you doing… You-”

 “ _No_ ,” she said again, that fierce, protective fire that Anders loved so much was burning more powerfully in her eyes than he’d ever seen before, “Don’t you _dare_ ask me to do that. Not to you. Not ever.” She was shaking, but she didn’t reach for him like she normally would. She couldn’t. Not yet. “Come with us. Help us fight the Templars.”

He watched her, almost disbelieving. She still wanted to keep him safe, after all this time, after everything he had done. He nodded, “I will. Damned right I will.”

They spun around, however, when they heard Sebastian’s voice, “No!” the prince snarled, pulling his bow from his back and knocking an arrow into it, aiming it at Anders, “He cannot be allowed to walk free.”

She knew the threat was real, so she quickly placed herself in front of Anders so that the arrow was pointed at her instead, “If you want Anders, you’ll have to go through me.”

“Stand aside,” Sebastian ordered, “If you cannot kill him, I will. He dies, or I am returning to Starkhaven. And I will bring such an army on my return that there will be nothing left of Kirkwall for these maleficarum to rule.” She didn’t move an inch. She stood there, unarmed, staring him down. He gave a hard laugh, “You truly are a fool. You defend him after everything he has done?” he narrowed his eyes at her.

“I defend him because he is _right_ ,” she told him, “I defend him because I cannot win this fight without him.”

“You defend him for love, and that love has blinded you from the truth. He must die.”

She stood fast, “You kill him, you have to kill me first.”

“You are unarmed.”

“Try it,” she challenged, “I dare you.” She stared him down, not moving an inch. She was ready to kill him if she had to. He would die before she let him hurt Anders.

“I expected more from you,” he said, “You claim to be a protector of innocents, and yet you will let this murderer go free.”

Garrett finally moved, coming to stand beside his sister, in front of his best friend. He was true to his word. Whatever she decided, he would stand by it.

Sebastian watched him for a moment, hoping for a flicker of his dearest friend, the man who sat with him for hours in the Chantry and talked with him about belief and duty, who dragged him to the Hanged Man so he wouldn’t miss out on all of the fun, who had only ever called him ‘Seb’, telling him that he didn’t care if he was a prince; he was his friend first, fancy names and titles second. But Garrett’s eyes narrowed on him.

“Do not interfere, Sebastian,” Garrett warned him.

 _So be it_ , the prince thought as he lowered his bow, trying not to flinch at how easily Garrett seemed to have made his decision, “I will not fight you both. My death here would serve no purpose. I will return to Starkhaven, but… I swear to you, I will come back, and find your precious Anders. I will teach him what true justice is!”

He left, and Marie let out a breath she didn’t know she’d been holding in. She wondered whether he could have done it; killed her just to take revenge on Anders.

The war was starting tonight, and none of them could stop it.

 

****

Fighting to the Gallows wasn’t easy. They split into two groups, Garrett leading one, Marie leading the other, agreeing to meet at the docks. Anders fought at her side, but didn’t say a word the entire time. Once they had finally arrived, having fought through the already war torn streets, he separated himself from the group as everyone patched up from the previous fights, readying themselves for the battle ahead.

He watched Marie as she made her way around the hall, speaking to each of her friends in turn, giving them instructions for the coming battle, pulling them all into a hug to thank them for sticking by her side even when the odds were against them and no doubt saying goodbye in case things didn’t go their way. Everyone had stood by them, with the exception of Sebastian. Fenris had taken some convincing, but in the end he knew where his loyalties lay.

Marie and Garrett stood together for a few moments, exchanging goodbyes of their own. But when they were done, she didn’t go to speak to the First Enchanter, instead she headed towards him. He stood, holding his breath, waiting for her to speak, to yell at him, tell him it was over, that her sparing him meant nothing and that she wanted nothing more to do with him.

But she said nothing. She stood in front of him, looking up at him, unable to fathom what to say.

“Say something,” he begged after a few moments.

She continued to watch him, anger burning in the normally warm brown of her eyes.

“Marie, please-” He barely got the word out before her hand shot out and she slapped him hard across the cheek. He winced from the pain.

She stared at him, tears in her eyes, “I accepted that you would have secrets, that you wouldn’t be able to tell me everything so that you could keep people safe, I understood what you were willing to sacrifice. But _this_?” she glanced around the Gallows, at the mages who were already tending to battle wounds and weeping for those that had been lost, “You assumed that I would kill you. I don’t care what you’ve done, you know that I would _never_ be able to do that. I would rather have helped you destroy the Chantry than even think about shoving my knife in your back.”

“I didn’t think you would have a choice,” he told her quietly, aching to reach for her, to wipe away her tears and comfort her, but he couldn’t. This was his fault.

“There is always a choice. Haven’t you understood it by now, you stupid bastard? I made my choice a long time ago, you know that.”

He hung his head, letting out a hard breath, “I should have trusted you.”

“Yes, you should have.”

They were both quiet for a moment, before the burning question pushed past his lips, “So what happens now?”

“Never again, do you hear me?”

He glanced up at her when he realised that the hard edge to her voice had eased, “What?”

“No more secrets, no more self-sacrifice, no more ‘I’d die for you’s. If we live through this, that is exactly what we are going to do; we are going to _live_. I told you once about the future I want for us; the cottage in Fereldan, with the garden, and a cat, and a kitchen so I can bake. We may never get it, but I’m willing to fight for it; are you?”

Her eyes met his and he felt his heart leap. She wasn’t going to leave him.

“I am,” he told her, “There is nothing I want more.”

She took hold of his hands, interlocking their fingers, squeezing them tight. He rested his forehead against hers, both savouring in the quiet intimacy of the moment. He knew she was angry, that it would take time for her to forgive the lies and deceptions and everything else. He had warned her of this, that it would always have come to this. That she would have to make a choice between staying in Kirkwall among the riches and the nobility, or being with him. But he should have realised sooner. She would always choose him.

“We’ll fight for a world where our children can be born mages and free,” he said, running his thumb over the back of her hand.

“ _Our_ children?” she looked at him.

“No one knows what the future will hold… One day, ten years, a hundred years from now, someone like me will love someone like you and there will be no Templars to tear them apart.”

She reached up on her tiptoes and pressed a kiss to his lips. It was gentle, and he barely had time to kiss her back before the sound of the Templars breaking down the door grew louder and she pulled away, but it was enough.

“The battle is beginning,” she said quietly, unsheathing her daggers, then looked up at him, “Stay with me?”

He readied his staff,  “There is nothing that could take me from your side.”


End file.
